Hello world!
Now before I start I hope you all know that this is not the ‘bitch’ section of Offish, I like to think of it as social enlightenment. Think of me more as truth-sayer than a celebrity hater.
Today’s hot topic is Celebhairties – yes celebrities with questionable hairstyles. No it isn’t big, it isn’t clever and it isn’t a topic that is likely to get me nominated for a MENSA membership but dangit it really grinds my gears. I was satisfying my ‘urban music YouTube browsing’ itch when I came across the surprisingly catchy new song by the interestingly named Wiz Khalifa (which sounds to me like a cross between a juvenile explanation for urine and an eccentric spoken word artist-but I digress).
There I was minding my business nodding my head nonchalantly when before my very eyes, the afro version of Rogue from the X-men in male rapping form appeared looking pointedly at the camera and making strange pointing gestures at the object of his affections. After the initial shock I started to ask myself when and how did such blatant buffoonery become an acceptable part of popular culture and style? (Chris Brown’s blonde shenanigans spring to mind here). As I shook my head in revulsion, the MTV universe not content with one bad-hair celebrity proceeded to slap my other cheek with an even bigger offender. Cassie revealed herself as said ‘love-interest’ in the video. Famed for that ONE song THAT ‘leaked’ picture and of course the proverbial side-head shave which has become synonymous with statement-making black women from New York to New-Benin market, there she was in all of her hot-pant clad, Timberland boot-wearing glory.
Now everybody is entitled to do with their hair what they wish, however, I also reserve the right to think that it looks foolish, especially when you have been blessed with good hair genes that gives your ACTUAL hair the shine, volume and length that women all over the world have been harassing unsuspecting Brazilians for since Beyonce made Crazy in Love. Get back to singing Cassie and do try and grow your hair back otherwise I’ll shave a Nike tick into it.
Now everybody is entitled to do with their hair what they wish, however, I also reserve the right to think that it looks foolish, especially when you have been blessed with good hair genes that gives your ACTUAL hair the shine, volume and length that women all over the world have been harassing unsuspecting Brazilians for since Beyonce made Crazy in Love. Get back to singing Cassie and do try and grow your hair back otherwise I’ll shave a Nike tick into it.
Interestingly this very same Wiz character is currently dating Kanye West’s ex girlfriend Amber Rose...I’d love to be a fly on the wall in that house...I wonder if they share the same hair dye....?
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